Continuing with something on the lighter side (to counteract the darkness of December), this is a gender neutral monologue slightly modified from Matt's monologue in "Love, Virtually" about the person he's been in "love" with since high school. He doesn't really love her because he doesn't really know her, but the whole play focuses on the Shrodenger's cat principle of dating: someone can be the perfect person for you if you don't ever really get to know them. It was a fun play (that was chosen one of the Best of Fringe the year it was at the Toronto Fringe Festival). It also included the only song I've ever written--I will totally post the audio file for that another day. Pictured is Alan Norman in the Toronto Fringe Festival production of Love, Virtually.
Max:
I really like you and I’d like to… Would you like to go out with me sometime? Before you answer, um, some things about me that might help you decide that you won’t find in a Google search: My name is Max. I recycle. I was a three time regional spelling bee champion in my grade school. I won $30 for that. I haven’t won a thing since. Sports were once important to me but I never want to own another jersey with my name on the back. I am adored by small children and puppies alike. I am always honest with my friends about most things. I will always tell you when you have something stuck in your teeth. I conscientiously place intelligent looking books on my bookshelves both to impress people and to hide my collection of Vin Diesel movies behind. I admire creative people who are fuelled by their passions. I lost my best friend a bunch of years ago and I’m haunted by the fear that if I go one day without thinking about him, I’ll forget him, and then it will be like he never existed. He’s the one who told me I wasn’t living unless I was taking chances. So here goes. Since the start of high school I have compared everybody I dated to you. And I realize that isn’t fair. To them or me. You’re amazing. And that’s not to say that the others weren’t, there’s just something about you. From the first time I saw you, sitting on the steps of the school, playing your guitar and singing. Not for anyone, completely oblivious to the rest of the kids running around on the stairs. You weren’t doing it for attention. Hell, you didn’t even notice when a bunch of kids started to gather around listening to you. You were just absorbed in it. Whenever I see you in the halls, walking with friends or completely on your own, you radiate confidence. Which seems really rare in high school. I have been so curious about you, but not brave enough. The longer I leave it, the harder it is. But then high school will be over and you will be gone. And the next time I see you, it’ll be our ten year reunion and then, then it will be too late. You’re my proverbial “what if” and I don’t want you to be a stranger anymore, I want to know you. Your turn. Tell me something true.
Comments